September 2011
54 posts
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gotta love stumbleupon sometimes
found on www.pickuplinegen.com
“Your clothes are making me uncomfortable. Please, take them off.”Generate new
an interesting article on 'good guy contracts' we... →
Football is gay
Why anyone would be entertained by a bunch of men in tight pants and shoulder pads chasing a piece of leather and smacking each other on the ass is beyond me. Seriously, it has to be the gayest sport on the planet. With exception maybe to actual gay activities… which I have zero experience with and for that I am grateful. If you watch or like football then I am very sorry and I do hope that...
Football is gay
Why anyone would be entertained by a bunch of men in tight pants and shoulder pads chasing a piece of leather and smacking each other on the ass is beyond me. Seriously, it has to be the gayest sport on the planet. With exception maybe to actual gay activities… which I have zero experience with and for that I am grateful. If you watch or like football then I am very sorry and I do hope that...
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Fair warning
In order to avoid answering the question ever again, I feel it is necessary to make sure the first and only time it is ever asked, the answer goes like this:
‘Honey does this (insert article of clothing here) make my ass look big?’
Now the normal, easy response is : ‘baby you look good in anything.’
Which will end up in the question being asked again in the...
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Poor guy
So, gaming, chillin with the window open, relaxin. Car pulls up outside at roughly 11-ish pm. Police car. Then up the long gravel drive came the fire trucks. Then more fire trucks. A couple ambulances and more police. Apparently the neighbors house burned to the ground. Luckily no one was more than injured (neighbor tried to save a few possessions, got hurt in the process).
I do hope he is ok, and...
Google whore
I am google’s bitch, converting people to chrome one computer illiterate person at a time :)
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The best holiday idea ever. →
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Prayer
What do we do when we sleep?
Keep one eye on the sky.
What do we do when we wake?
Keep both eyes on the sky.
What do we do when we see one?
Dig hard, dig deep, find shelter, and don’t look back
Sometimes you just gotta bust out a line like....
Whatdya mean?
Bend over and i’ll show you…
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Sometimes in life, shit happens, some one has to deal with it, and who ya gonna call?
Pete Venkman
i sometimes make rage comics.... →
Ministry of funny walks
Someone at work asks, ‘crispy, why are you walking funny’ my answer out loud, ‘my knee is bothering me’
My answer in my head that wouldn’t make sense to them… ‘i cut myself shaving’
“Wise man say forgiveness is divine but never pay full price for late pizza”
– Michelangelo, not the artist, the turtle…
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Halo...
“Crazy damn fool, why do you always jump? One of these days you’re gonna land on something as stubborn as you are, and I don’t do bits and pieces” sargent-major johnson Halo 3
can't rain all the time
woke up and discovered that it is raining outside. rain is not a bad thing. there are worse things than water falling from the sky. sometimes rain brings joy to my heart, the joy of watching the ground soak up the much needed moisture, the joy of the trees and plants soaking up the precious life giving fluid. sometimes it brings sorrow, the sorrow of knowing that for the day i am stuck indoors....
Where am I?
I remember a time when gps didn’t exist, maps were the best way to figure out where you were going and it was ok to stop and ask directions when you got lost. Where we are now, with gps giving people directions and even reporting traffic updates, leads me to think that we as a society are becomming too dependant on technology to guide us. Your gps shouldn’t I fluence what direction you...
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34 rules that everyone should live by →
I can
I am hungry. I seek to fill myself with life sustaining nutritious goodness. I can has cheeseburger? Yes. Yes i can
hey ladies... ;) →
found this article via a stumble. can’t tell if it’s a hoax or actually based on fact. in either case…. i volunteer?
:'(
sometimes, being a parent just plain hurts…
On top
For one brief shining moment i was on top of the world looking down at what lay there at my feet and i felt blessed for having seen it. Then the moment passed and i opened my eyes upon the truth. No matter how high you climb, the bottom rises with you and is always but a step beneath you
year 32
Another year has passed. I hit the age of 32 and feel no different than when I was 30, or 25, or for that matter 16… I am the same boy I was back then. Sure I’ve gained some experience, and a little wisdom on my journey. Yes, I have learned to love, to live, and to let the past stay where it is. Have I become a better person? That isn’t for me to decide. I am now who I will most...
The cake is not a lie
It is moist and delicious, sweet, decadant, and smothered in yum
meh not my day...
Rainy, boring, will be cooking my own birthday dinner… :/
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great people
Great people talk about ideas
Average people talk about things
Small people talk about other people
just four days
almost there, almost…
on forever
if i had to say what i thought heaven or hell was like, heaven, an eternity of love. no sorrow, no regrets, just absolute joy at being in creation at all, even if in just a ‘spiritual’ form… if you will
hell is an eternity of hatred, bitterness, and regret. shame at life poorly lived and too many regretable choices.
i firmly believe we make our own heaven and hell. like the...